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Tuesday, May 27, 2014

Pushing Towards or Pulled Towards Your Goal

Whenever I see friends sign up for a race, instantly, their training intensifies.  Why?  Does signing up for a race put the fear of God in them that they're forced to train?  Well... Kind of.

There are two different ways that you can physically move an object.  You can push it... or you can pull it.  In the same way, when we have goals, we either push ourselves towards the goal, or we get pulled by the goal itself.

So what then, should we do?

It makes sense that most of us enjoy the push towards success, but does the willpower last that long?  The answer is... no.  It doesn't.  So whenever you decide to go for a goal and believe that you can push yourself to that goal, prepare to be disappointed.  Not only will the willpower lose its effect within a week or so, but you won't really feel like attempting to get to that goal again because you've been defeated and you won't believe in yourself (if you do, the willpower will run out faster).

So instead, are we to find a way to have something pull us towards success?  The push runs out easily, but when some 'force' is pulling us towards success, then we aren't putting forth as much effort to get to being successful.  In signing up for a race, what happens is that we have a goal that we've set.  We put the money down, we're gambling with our pride, honor, cash, and our self identity.  The moment you make that commitment and sign up for a race, you begin moving towards that, because you've committed.  When you've committed enough things into it, you get pulled in by the race.  You have the feeling of 'oh crap, if I don't train, I'm not going to do well in this race.' or 'I don't want to waste money!  I gotta work hard to make it worth the money I spent' or any other reason.  Once you have something pulling you towards your goal, between the pushing and pulling, you're able to get that much closer to your goal.

Think of it in this way.  When you're passionate about something, there's no way it's hard work for you to talk about it.  When it's something you enjoy doing, there's no way you won't be doing it.  Why do people do things?  Because they're invested in it, one way or another, and when you've invested yourself in something, you get pulled towards that.

So if getting pulled to your goals is something that'll get you to your goals, why don't people do it?

Well, I'm no expert on people, but I can tell you this.  People only do what they want to do, and if they don't really want to do it... then they won't.  If a person decides that they want to change their lifestyle and become fit, then they would go towards that goal and push themselves.  However, a change in lifestyle will be difficult.  That difficulty will make the person really figure out whether or not they want the goal.  However, if they are 'addicted' to their old lifestyle, then that would mean that the want/need to get in better shape wasn't strong enough to pull them because they wanted to push.  Sometimes, it's due to the lack of drive.  Sometimes, it's because it was a wish-list and not a real thing.

So how can you start pulling towards your goals?

So let me tell you a story about the time when I was a freshman in high school.  I wasn't exactly the popular kid, and I was actually... very shy.  I had a hard time speaking up and didn't really stand out much.  That all changed when I met this girl.  She was a year older than me and she was attractive in every possible way.  She ran, loved God, and had the most gorgeous eyes.  Of course, there were more to it than that, but that's not the main part of the story.  So anyway, I was head over heels for this girl and was shy.  It was a bad place to be, and I knew it.  She was popular, and I was invisible.  So I needed to change something.  I had a goal, and I really 'needed' to get there.  I started talking to people, getting to know more people, and found out a whole new world. I found learning about people interesting and getting to know them, I started to get to know even more people.  I kept going on and on until before I knew it, I had been pulled up to the same level and was able to stand a lot more confident in myself.  I started practicing my instrument, and mastered them, studied for math and became better at it.  I ran on my own free time, and worked out as much as I could.  I became the smart math whiz, played almost every musical instrument the band offered, became one of the top runners in my region, and also got to know all the other people in different schools.  It wasn't because I pushed and clawed my way up, that I was able to get up that far.  It was because I was pulled up by my desire that I was able to grow and develop and become the person I am today.

Unfortunately, nothing really happened with her because in relationships... I tend to move as slow as a snail, but what I got out of it was a different perspective of the world.  My desire had pulled me up to being able to talk to others, stretch myself so that I would be able to do whatever I wanted to do, and in doing that, I have the confidence that I have in sharing my stories in hope that I would be able to encourage those around to stand up and be pulled up to their full potential.  

If you truly want something or are passionate about something, push, but don't forget to be pulled.  Create opportunities and place yourself in them.  Stretch yourself so that you can grow.  Pull yourself up to greatness and create that specific goal that would have the power to pull you up high.

Be awesome.

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